You're being avoidant because it was very sweet and I'm going to overwhelm you with love. I get it.
Istredd can't possibly make himself less like a sunbeam when Lucifer made such a lovely gesture. So if Lucifer needs to come back when he feels like he can handle it better, that's fine. He is currently looking through the book. It's fiction, which means he's not really that interested in the story, but the pages are old and the cover unique and it's more his type than anything shiny like in Hayle.
And it's a credit to how much Istredd's grown since coming here on his end too, that he lacks the same uncertainty that he had in the start. He was insecure a lot in the beginning, being so isolated from others, but stability in relationships has helped. And he knows Lucifer is drawn to him in part due to his intensity, otherwise they wouldn't be good together.
You did not.
Istredd assumes he did something possibly related to it just so he could say them and somewhat mean them. He hugs the book to his chest like he did in the bookshop, smiling to himself. Technically a non-fiction book would actually be useful to him, but it's all about symbols.
If the kid has them, I doubt they'd be surprised. Just as you're not surprised when Wilhelm does something very teenager.
Istredd knows Jack hasn't stopped being a topic or a pain point, but Wilhelm is Lucifer's true parental relationship, and it's a positive one. Even with that hiccup, it turned into something real and strong. Istredd still doesn't entirely understand teenage behavior, his own rearing so specific, although he and Kell have created a stronger bond than he expected he could have. It's a series of feelings he's working on accepting.
True, we were already in each other's pockets before that, but this accelerated it. Their closeness began before the bond, that simply cemented it in an undeniable way. But they found a harmony as roommates and friends first.
I don't read fiction but I'm going to try to read this one.
It could be the worst-written book of all time and I would still cherish it because my partner got it for me as a romantic gesture.
Wipe that smirk off your face, he's not done being made of mush. Not any time soon! This is all your own fault, Lucifer. Istredd is going to be happy about this and Lucifer can't ruin it, sorry. He's in high spirits.
Their room has shifted in that mostly they live on Lucifer's side and in Lucifer's bed. He is neat and cleans every day, making beds, putting things in order. He has always done that even before they were a couple, a routine in the morning wakes him up. Currently the only thing on Istredd's side of the room, treasured on his bed, is that book.
Istredd waits for the door to close and gets into Lucifer's space, cupping his face with his hands and kissing him firmly. He doesn't make it last until he has to gasp for air because Lucifer asked him a question, but it's mean to be a sign of gratitude. He pulls away with a smile.
"You say that like I plan on ever being tolerable."
"Yes, always." Said fondly. Istredd pulls him into a light hug, usually very content to do that to show affection, except Lucifer has to follow it up with that and he leans back, distraught.
"You didn't." As Lucifer said before, he doesn't like Chaos, and the comedy of it is that the bookstore did have a sort of chaos to it. If the owner lets him stay in there for long, he's going to organize the entire thing for free. "I am not going to sleep until it's fixed." And it's too late for them to go. Rude.
"What?" he sounds scandalized, even his thoughts echoing it for a moment. He puts a hand over his own chest. "You don't like scavenger hunts? Oh, well that's going to be a real cryin' shame then, all that work I put into it..."
His thoughts were giving way before he even finished talking, and he claps both his hands to Istredd's shoulders, laughing more than Istredd would likely appreciate, but he's smoothing out folds of fabric as he gives Istredd's mind the offering of memory: Lucifer simply taking the book from where it had been put, nothing else in its place, nothing out of sort.
Istredd narrows his eyes at him, waiting for confirmation one way or the other. As well as he can read Lucifer when it counts, his partner is very good at hiding smaller jokes like this so he's not always sure. By the time Lucifer laughs though, he knows that he didn't do it, so he flashes him that annoyed look that's combined with amusement.
"Sometimes I just want to strangle you." His hands drop to Lucifer's hips and he reels him in, pressing a kiss to his forehead. And over that brilliant mind that also enjoys tormenting him. Istredd often plays along too because Lucifer gets glee out of being irritating.
Istredd is happy however he manages to get Lucifer to grin like that, even when it's at his expense, sometimes especially when it's at his expense. Lucifer likes being mischievous and Istredd tends to be the 'straight man' when it comes to their humor. It balances out and occasionally is flipped.
"Oh you're a first in a lot of ways, my love. Although I'm a first in more." Smug smug smug. Endlessly smug. Sorry that's never going to stop either. "Imagine if you decided I wasn't a good enough placeholder."
"I would've dug you out from the libraries one way or another. It just would've been equal levels of the shit that I gave Kyle in the beginning." Amused. "But unlike him you'd have gone along and rivaled it."
Istredd had a good way of meeting Lucifer head on in unexpected ways. He knows they wouldn't have gone further without the bond, but he also knows them both well enough that all Lucifer needed was a little give for him to sink his teeth into Istredd early on, and the beats would've just been hit at different angles.
Istredd smiles and ruffles his hair affectionately. "I like how certain you are that we were meant to be." Definitely teasing, although there is an element of that which is true. Lucifer is certain that he would've eventually met him and their connection would've flared to life. It would've taken longer and in a different way, but still. Meant to be, with that mentality.
Istredd's hands always have to be busy, hungry to touch him always, playing with the bottom of his shirt. "Okay so you didn't know you wanted me until we kissed, but when did you know you liked me as a person?"
He of course didn't mean it like that, but sure, fine, it sounds like it!!
"Like you? That needs a narrower definition." Because Lucifer has levels. "But I suppose deciding to not threaten killing you for being a telepath in my immediate presence is a fair starting point."
"Yes, like me. It doesn't need a narrower definition, you know what I mean." Istredd rolls his eyes. Lucifer's feelings aren't so vague as he thinks, although maybe not as obvious to him. Istredd didn't need a psychic connection with him to be able to start reading him and grudging affection. But that time does line up. Choosing not to threaten him is like that for Lucifer.
He leans in to kiss him lightly, hand curling in the collar of his shirt to tug him in for it. It's not lingering, he feels like it when Lucifer is being sweet. "I already considered us friends by that point, but for me it was when you got me when I was stuck in the Horizon."
Istredd liked him earlier because it was natural, but when he realized Lucifer was actually his friend was then. He got his body into their room and then entered the Horizon knowing it may be dangerous to stick by him as it shook. That meant a lot to him.
"Yes it does. Because there's liking you enough that I at least considered your opinion--I wouldn't say trust. There's liking you enough that I wasn't simply going to let you die at whatever convenient timing came up." He could map that one easily with Wilhelm. Less easily with Kell ah hah whoops nothing to worry about there. "And there's trusting you with my mind."
He lists the possibilities and why there needs to be a narrower definition because he's a little shit but also because he thinks Istredd may appreciate it in the weird way that they are.
"But." But. "I don't have that answer, either, not really."
Because Lucifer doesn't know when it changed. He hadn't expected anything to change. He just remembers not expecting to lose anyone when he was afflicted and not the shock of the absence but the shock at their return.
"It was sometime before the heralds showed up." They had talked enough about the afflictions, more than once. "Probably for just some mundane, dumb reason."
So. Friendship and liking other people is just as complicated as... anything and everything else.
The joys of not being human!
Actually, frankly, simply the joys of being an extremely Sheltered Individual.
"You were an uphill battle to be certain, little did I know." They both started out on an even surface, tolerating each other to see if it was easier than getting a new roommate. Istredd probably generally liked him sooner, he was pleasant company, he pulled him out of the library when he didn't have to. Most of the time people just left him alone. He wasn't used to someone coming for him.
"But I don't know, in a strange way, it's felt easy with you too. I've always struggled with uncertainty about other people, but with you, it felt ... natural." Which shouldn't be possible as they are unnatural. Different worlds, different species, highly different backgrounds. It's the truth though.
Even now it is easy to lean his forehead against Lucifer's, put an arm around his waist to reel him in, close, comfortable. "I'm glad that you like me. Especially for the mundane, dumb reasons."
Lucifer is either Great at leaving people alone and the Most Annoying.
"Were an uphill battle?" He still is, you can't tell him otherwise. He knows.
Thorne gave them a lot of problems. Thorne also put them in a space where they either had to rely on each other or become a bloodbath and instantly betray one another. They picked a route, but it always makes Lucifer cautious of new Summoned. How the boat will get rocked. How they all get screwed because one person started a Rube Goldberg Machine of problems with just something so small.
He doesn't blame Wilhelm for anything; Wilhelm blames himself enough on his own.
But the kid's anxiety is a prime offering for the life they have in Thorne.
One, out-of-place anxiety.
"I have to be considered natural somewhere," he jests.
"I mean before I understood you." Uphill until he could really get what was going on with Lucifer, crack himself into his mind and spill out some of his secrets. Now Istredd's managed that, but he knows that Lucifer wouldn't like to be past tense a battle. It's in his nature to be difficult.
"You will always be a challenge, Lucifer. I wouldn't want you any other way." The absolute truth. Istredd's in love with him because of it. He likes that he's difficult. That's why he thinks it's oddly natural.
He worries about new people all of the time too. Every time they seem like they have balanced the Thorne Summoned well, a new group comes in, with all the threats and concerns that brings. But he felt that way in the start too, and now they all have one another. He's willing to be patient with others. To a point.
It's easier with Lucifer. Having that solid ground to fall back on, always.
"It's not like I'm easy." Laughable! Istredd only appears to be that way. A different kind of difficult.
Istredd's the only one that would see Lucifer as a solid ground and that's. Well. That's everything.
Unspoken, as it is. Untranslated, as most thoughts from Lucifer are. The problems of being connected to an extremely inhuman mind.
"Ha! You're easy for me. Easy to read."
From someone that's accustomed to manipulating and twisting souls.
He reaches up and thumbs behind Istredd's ear.
"Easy to understand touch." He drags the same hand down behind Istredd, to the small of his back, grinning, "Comfort." He nudges towards Istredd, lips parted. It's whether or not anyone is willing to put in the effort. For both of them. For as fucked up as they both are, myriad of complications and all.
Lucifer is the most solid ground Istredd's had for a long time. He's not even certain he's ever found it with another person. The last thing he and Yennefer could be was solid. They always knew they were doomed as the Brotherhood wouldn't allow a relationship between mages to get in the way of their politics. They were naive in hoping maybe they could keep pieces, but the only solid ground Istredd's ever found was solo. Something he made for himself.
He didn't know this is what love could be like too.
"Oh good, I'm an open book to you. As long as it's not a boring book." His tone is dry.
Istredd laughs when Lucifer utilizes touch to win him over, and it works, of course, it'll always work. He's grinning when he leans in and kisses him, as Lucifer already knew that he would, because his parted lips are inviting and he is weak.
Loving you is effortless, for me. Easy. Natural, as he's said.
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Istredd can't possibly make himself less like a sunbeam when Lucifer made such a lovely gesture. So if Lucifer needs to come back when he feels like he can handle it better, that's fine. He is currently looking through the book. It's fiction, which means he's not really that interested in the story, but the pages are old and the cover unique and it's more his type than anything shiny like in Hayle.
Thank you. It means a lot to me.
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That he's a-fucking-lot, sometimes.
Lucifer just isn't always prepared to handle it.
I sold a firecracker to a small child for the money to buy it.
That's not exactly what happened and it's Lucifer so 'small child' is relative and 'firecracker' is also inaccurate but it's basically the truth.
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And it's a credit to how much Istredd's grown since coming here on his end too, that he lacks the same uncertainty that he had in the start. He was insecure a lot in the beginning, being so isolated from others, but stability in relationships has helped. And he knows Lucifer is drawn to him in part due to his intensity, otherwise they wouldn't be good together.
You did not.
Istredd assumes he did something possibly related to it just so he could say them and somewhat mean them. He hugs the book to his chest like he did in the bookshop, smiling to himself. Technically a non-fiction book would actually be useful to him, but it's all about symbols.
I genuinely feel like I've known you a lifetime.
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It's not going to hurt anyone but it's sure going to annoy the kid's parents, if they have any.
So.
Yeah...
He definitely Did Something.
I think being in each other's heads kind of ups the feeling of how long it's been.
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Istredd knows Jack hasn't stopped being a topic or a pain point, but Wilhelm is Lucifer's true parental relationship, and it's a positive one. Even with that hiccup, it turned into something real and strong. Istredd still doesn't entirely understand teenage behavior, his own rearing so specific, although he and Kell have created a stronger bond than he expected he could have. It's a series of feelings he's working on accepting.
True, we were already in each other's pockets before that, but this accelerated it. Their closeness began before the bond, that simply cemented it in an undeniable way. But they found a harmony as roommates and friends first.
I don't read fiction but I'm going to try to read this one.
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Says the age-old prankster-at-heart.
I hope it's excessively boring and drives you mad.
:)))
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Wipe that smirk off your face, he's not done being made of mush. Not any time soon! This is all your own fault, Lucifer. Istredd is going to be happy about this and Lucifer can't ruin it, sorry. He's in high spirits.
Symbolically, it's perfect.
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He recognizes he did this to himself but still.
This isn't going to Go Away anytime soon so eventually he does show up, hands shoved in pockets.
"How long are you going to be intolerable for, you think?"
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Istredd waits for the door to close and gets into Lucifer's space, cupping his face with his hands and kissing him firmly. He doesn't make it last until he has to gasp for air because Lucifer asked him a question, but it's mean to be a sign of gratitude. He pulls away with a smile.
"You say that like I plan on ever being tolerable."
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Said unkindly, but per usual his thoughts disregard the tone.
"I put a book in the wrong place I took that from."
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"You didn't." As Lucifer said before, he doesn't like Chaos, and the comedy of it is that the bookstore did have a sort of chaos to it. If the owner lets him stay in there for long, he's going to organize the entire thing for free. "I am not going to sleep until it's fixed." And it's too late for them to go. Rude.
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His thoughts were giving way before he even finished talking, and he claps both his hands to Istredd's shoulders, laughing more than Istredd would likely appreciate, but he's smoothing out folds of fabric as he gives Istredd's mind the offering of memory: Lucifer simply taking the book from where it had been put, nothing else in its place, nothing out of sort.
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"Sometimes I just want to strangle you." His hands drop to Lucifer's hips and he reels him in, pressing a kiss to his forehead. And over that brilliant mind that also enjoys tormenting him. Istredd often plays along too because Lucifer gets glee out of being irritating.
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"Happy anniversary to meeting the first person here you wanted to strangle."
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"Oh you're a first in a lot of ways, my love. Although I'm a first in more." Smug smug smug. Endlessly smug. Sorry that's never going to stop either. "Imagine if you decided I wasn't a good enough placeholder."
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"I would've dug you out from the libraries one way or another. It just would've been equal levels of the shit that I gave Kyle in the beginning." Amused. "But unlike him you'd have gone along and rivaled it."
Istredd had a good way of meeting Lucifer head on in unexpected ways. He knows they wouldn't have gone further without the bond, but he also knows them both well enough that all Lucifer needed was a little give for him to sink his teeth into Istredd early on, and the beats would've just been hit at different angles.
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Istredd's hands always have to be busy, hungry to touch him always, playing with the bottom of his shirt. "Okay so you didn't know you wanted me until we kissed, but when did you know you liked me as a person?"
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"Like you? That needs a narrower definition." Because Lucifer has levels. "But I suppose deciding to not threaten killing you for being a telepath in my immediate presence is a fair starting point."
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He leans in to kiss him lightly, hand curling in the collar of his shirt to tug him in for it. It's not lingering, he feels like it when Lucifer is being sweet. "I already considered us friends by that point, but for me it was when you got me when I was stuck in the Horizon."
Istredd liked him earlier because it was natural, but when he realized Lucifer was actually his friend was then. He got his body into their room and then entered the Horizon knowing it may be dangerous to stick by him as it shook. That meant a lot to him.
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He lists the possibilities and why there needs to be a narrower definition because he's a little shit but also because he thinks Istredd may appreciate it in the weird way that they are.
"But." But. "I don't have that answer, either, not really."
Because Lucifer doesn't know when it changed. He hadn't expected anything to change. He just remembers not expecting to lose anyone when he was afflicted and not the shock of the absence but the shock at their return.
"It was sometime before the heralds showed up." They had talked enough about the afflictions, more than once. "Probably for just some mundane, dumb reason."
So. Friendship and liking other people is just as complicated as... anything and everything else.
The joys of not being human!
Actually, frankly, simply the joys of being an extremely Sheltered Individual.
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"But I don't know, in a strange way, it's felt easy with you too. I've always struggled with uncertainty about other people, but with you, it felt ... natural." Which shouldn't be possible as they are unnatural. Different worlds, different species, highly different backgrounds. It's the truth though.
Even now it is easy to lean his forehead against Lucifer's, put an arm around his waist to reel him in, close, comfortable. "I'm glad that you like me. Especially for the mundane, dumb reasons."
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"Were an uphill battle?" He still is, you can't tell him otherwise. He knows.
Thorne gave them a lot of problems. Thorne also put them in a space where they either had to rely on each other or become a bloodbath and instantly betray one another. They picked a route, but it always makes Lucifer cautious of new Summoned. How the boat will get rocked. How they all get screwed because one person started a Rube Goldberg Machine of problems with just something so small.
He doesn't blame Wilhelm for anything; Wilhelm blames himself enough on his own.
But the kid's anxiety is a prime offering for the life they have in Thorne.
One, out-of-place anxiety.
"I have to be considered natural somewhere," he jests.
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"You will always be a challenge, Lucifer. I wouldn't want you any other way." The absolute truth. Istredd's in love with him because of it. He likes that he's difficult. That's why he thinks it's oddly natural.
He worries about new people all of the time too. Every time they seem like they have balanced the Thorne Summoned well, a new group comes in, with all the threats and concerns that brings. But he felt that way in the start too, and now they all have one another. He's willing to be patient with others. To a point.
It's easier with Lucifer. Having that solid ground to fall back on, always.
"It's not like I'm easy." Laughable! Istredd only appears to be that way. A different kind of difficult.
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Unspoken, as it is. Untranslated, as most thoughts from Lucifer are. The problems of being connected to an extremely inhuman mind.
"Ha! You're easy for me. Easy to read."
From someone that's accustomed to manipulating and twisting souls.
He reaches up and thumbs behind Istredd's ear.
"Easy to understand touch." He drags the same hand down behind Istredd, to the small of his back, grinning, "Comfort." He nudges towards Istredd, lips parted. It's whether or not anyone is willing to put in the effort. For both of them. For as fucked up as they both are, myriad of complications and all.
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He didn't know this is what love could be like too.
"Oh good, I'm an open book to you. As long as it's not a boring book." His tone is dry.
Istredd laughs when Lucifer utilizes touch to win him over, and it works, of course, it'll always work. He's grinning when he leans in and kisses him, as Lucifer already knew that he would, because his parted lips are inviting and he is weak.
Loving you is effortless, for me. Easy. Natural, as he's said.
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today on things Lucifer says that would usually be offensive but aren't meant to be
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They are SHAMELESS
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remembering now to say NSFW
mildly important / I'm sorry world for what I keep doing to this CLASSIC song
LOL
my last apology, world
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